The Rewards of Waiting.

If I ever hear the word patience again I may just do something terrible. I have lived that word most of my life, I am a decisive woman who makes her mind up and then likes to act on it, this hurry up and wait is exasperating.
But, what I have learned from the word is that when it is right it is worth waiting for and that you cannot hurry any thing if it is not yet right. So patience and I have become almost friends, we have learnt to put an idea out there and wait to see if it is the right one. If I get excited and try to rush it, it will put the breaks on me and then it is all full stop. So gently slowly, and for a personality like mine hell to do, I have learnt to walk before running, to believe trust and give it to the universe for approval before acting on the thought.
5 years for this last one, 5 years of believing, following running, crawling, begging, distrusting, hating, loving, hurting, loosing but at the end of it, gaining bigger than expected, deeper and stronger than ever, I have learnt that when it is right even though it is not on my time table, it will be what it is meant to be.
It all comes down to trust, to trust you have to believe, to believe you can have no doubt, to have no doubts you have to practice the art of positive thinking = positive living. It all comes down to choice, not of where we are going, that was long ago decided, but in how we journey, and in what frame of mind.
I admit for a person who preaches positive thinking, I do falter some times, I allow other peoples negativity to come in and cloud my belief. I have lived with the negative vibes around me all my life, was always told I couldn’t not that I could. To this day I still get it from people who remember me how I was not who I now am. They do not see me in this light of positive belief and that just maybe I can make it happen and that maybe I did make it happen.
Peoples perspectives are hard to change, some don’t want to because your change from adversity to possibilities is to hard for them to do them selves, so they keep you down with them or dam you for climbing above the hell and succeeding.
It does surprise you who at the end of the day who do believe in you. I have some wonderful people who have followed my many long journeys and their belief in me and encourage meant has kept me going when it got too bad. I am very lucky, for one never travels alone, when you start out you think it is you against the world and as you travel you find out just whom your friends are because in a supportive way they are making the journey with you. I could not have got here without them and I will take them into our success with me because they should share the benefits as it is for them also.
So now after 5 long years, hunger, stress beyond belief, testing over and over again, roller coaster rides from hell, imbeciles I stand at the brink of accomplishment.
The hardest thing out of all of this was to believe truly believe that I could do it, Bill my business partner believed in me, those special friends did, and even though my family freaked out over the direction I was going in, they supported me in hopes that I was after all, right about it all.
Now just 3 more weeks and one hard turbulent journey comes to an end and an inspiring new adventure begins. My new life and the hope and possibilities of new hopes and dreams for those that travel with us will be invigorating, and I will finally say to patience, thank you friend for where you have led me.
Never give up and never give in, but learn to follow Gods plan instead of trying to rewrite it.
Possibilities to everyone.
Sara Towe
March/2010
Alas it did not happen, it is not only patience but peoples commitment that one needs and both are challenging me. One day I will find someone who is a believer that commits.